Last visit with my guy was the same and different.

At the door, I could not just enter using the posted combination. Now all visitors must ring to get in, then answer questions about their health status.

Clearly, the VA does not want Covid-19 coming into their wards, and who can blame them?

I swore that I was healthy and was admitted.

I declined to wear the mask they offered since I thought it would be pretty upsetting for my guy to see me like that.

Our short visit was an extension of the recent ones: he opened his eyes when I touched his arm and greeted him.

He stared at me and then tried to say something, but no words came out. I leaned closer, but there was not even a whisper.

Really, I had and have no idea what he very much wanted to convey.

He drifted back to closed eyes, opened them from time to time. I showed him some photos on my phone.

I showed him the video of Doyle Lawson greeting him.

But no idea if any of it got through.

Today I got a text from the family that the new VA rule is absolutely no visitors outside of immediate family for the foreseeable future. I said to let me know when that is lifted.

Then I went to my calendar app, where weekly VA visits have been on permanent repeat, twice a week, for years.

I deleted both of them.

Maybe some day the virus restriction will end.

Maybe my guy will still be alive when that happens.

Maybe he will know or care that I am there.

This is hardly the biggest piece fallout from this virus pandemic, but so far, it is kinda big for me.