This was not a good visit. For the first time, my guy was difficult, demanding, and angry with me.

Over time, I have brought him many photos of the park where we met and worked in together. Usually we go through them all and talk about each photo.

This time he commanded me to take all the photos out of the two notebooks we had them in, stuff them all into one, then take it home with me. Normally, he likes to show others the notebooks, and I figured he would miss them later, so I agreed to take the book, but quietly left it there.

He demanded I get him out of his wheelchair, which I could not do: he can not stand on his own. When I explained that I couldn’t he yelled at me.

We had a few more arguments and then I was out of time and explained I had to leave, which he seemed to accept, but then I could hear him yelling my name as I walked down the hallway. It was like leaving a child behind.

I left, pondering the fact that the nurses and aides put in long shifts and can’t walk away when things get difficult.

Hopefully Sunday will be a better visit.